By Rev. Fr. Vincent Iwuchukwu
INTRODUCTION
I once read a story of a young Christian youth. He said, “Both God and pornography grabbed my attention at a young age. At age six my father introduced me to Jesus and at twelve, a classmate presented me with pornography. For years these two loves would compete as I sought to serve God while secretly hiding an insatiable hunger for self-destructive sexual indulgence. This conflict continued for over a decade. Years of false starts and self-induced suffering eventually resulted in surrender. I finally sought help.” The above personal story beams a clear light on the reality of sexual addiction amongst young Christians today. Although the Church is holy but its members bear the mark of sin in their body. So, many Christians suffer from this terrible scourge of sexual addiction. Whereas too few are talking about it, many Christian men and women, and children are mesmerized by the sting of sexual addiction. On daily basis we experience Christians who love God tell their stories of being caught in an addiction web and others who shy away from speaking out only to die in silence. Sexual addiction among young Christians can lead to a major spiritual crisis, religious apathy, feeling of guilt, shame, worthlessness which hinders their ability to connect with God and their faith. Against this backdrop, this write-up will seek to x-ray the menace of sexual addiction among Christians, especially young Christians and also proffer practical ways in which the issues can be resolved.
EXPLICATION OF KEY CONCEPTS: Sex and Sexuality, Sexual Addiction
Sexuality and Sex
First and foremost, it is important to state that sexuality is a fundamental constituent of our humanness. It is God’s precious gift to us – ‘male and female he created them’ (Gen. 1:27). Sexuality “is a quality of being human”(cf. Rosemarie Mihelich Hogan, Human Sexuality: A Nursing Perspective, xv). Sexuality is wider than sex but includes the latter. Sexuality “refers to a fundamental component of personality in and through which we, as male or female, experience our relatedness to self, others, the world and even God.” Sex refers either to the biological aspects of being male or female, or to the expressions of sexuality, which have physical, psychological and spiritual dimensions, particularly genital actions resulting in sexual intercourse and/or orgasm” (cf. United States Catholic Conference, Human Sexuality: A Catholic Perspective, 9)
Sexual Addiction
Sexual addiction is primarily defined as a total compromise of an individual’s ability to control his or her sexual appetites or urges for sexual exhibition of whatever type. Sexual exhibitions mean all kind of sexual activities that a client might be compulsively inclined to such as pornography, masturbation, and pedophilia and so on. Sexual addiction is primarily a function of three major forces: neurochemical, psychological and spiritual complications.
CHRISTIANS AND THE REALITY OF SEXUAL ADDICTION
Sexuality is a divine gift. And God, who created humanity, male and female, saw all creation including sexuality, as good. But unfortunately, this good gift of God has been and is still being exploited by the enemy to wreak havoc to God’s own children. The original aspiration of sexual desire was “to be the very power to love in the image of God through the sincere gift of self”. (cf. Christopher West, Celibacy for the Kingdom and the fulfillment of Human Sexuality). But sin has distorted this original intent. Hence, everyone must contend with the disorders of lust including sexual addictive patterns. It is needless to stress that many Christians are steeped in sexual addiction, as studies and reports have shown. Statistics show that Christians – and even church pastors- engage in viewing porn at almost the same rates as the popular population. The research studies by Barna Group and Covenant Eyes report that, “70% of Christian Youth pastors report that they have had at least one teen come to them for help in dealing with porn. 68% of church-going men and over 50% of pastors view porn on a regular basis. Of young Christian adults 18-24 years old, 76% actively search for porn. Only 13% of self-identified Christian women say they never watched porn – 87% of Christian women have watched porn. 11 is the average age that a child is first exposed to porn, and 94% of children will see porn by the age of 14” ( cf. https://www.Missionfrontiers.org/issue/article/15 Mind-Blowing Statistics about Pornography and the Church). Masturbation is another sexual cankerworm eating deeply into the fabrics of young people today. And many young Christians are discouraged and defeated in their fight to overcome sexual sin. Many are so overwhelmed that they give up their fight against it, stop praying, and stop attending mass or church programs. Others simply stop believing in God altogether and fashion a god that approves of their sinful lifestyle.
I see this all as an assault from the pit of hell, an orchestrated attempt to capture the future of the church’s youth, and to bind them with chains of sexual sins. And to achieve this, sex has been weaponized, seeds of sexual immorality are sown into the lives of young children at early age and spiritual destinies are thwarted. The church is not immune to the ravaging sexual freedom being touted by the world. In our Nigerian context, it is very much evident that the conservative moral norms that guided the exercise of sexuality have in our own time given way to the sexualized cultural influence of Europe and America. This is largely because of the obvious sexualization in Western pop culture which has become a stronghold of sexual cultural re-orientation among our youths. The growing culture of “hooking up” whereby young adults engage in non-committal sex detached not only from love and commitment but from all romantic involvement” makes sexual addiction easy. There are factors responsible for this menace in the church. Factors ranging from sexual abuse of minors and vulnerable adults, utilitarian view of sexuality, peer pressure in church groups, carnality and worldliness, parental irresponsibility, societal influence, etc. But despite the worrisome trend of sexual addiction, the church is not sleeping in the area of finding solutions. The church has had structures put in place to bring healing and therapy to its members.
RECOMMENDATIONS
- Application of Professional Sexual Addiction Rehabilitation Methods: Most of the persons who handle sexual addiction in many churches are not well trained for that, as many of them are just Sunday school teachers/ moral instructors or catechists. This accounts for the unprofessional methods applied and the poor result in the life of those seeking help.
- The Need to Train More Christians in the Area of Sexual Addiction Therapy: If we must wage war against the Devil’s onslaught on the church through sexual addiction, there is an urgent need to train more Christian personnel. Churches ought to send youth coaches, teachers, and even young volunteers for such training.
- Spiritual Solution: Christian faith offers a way to heal and get over this struggle through frequenting the sacraments, especially Confession and Holy Eucharist, prayer, bible study and the intercession of the Saints. In rare cases where there is a suspicion of spiritual influences, it is the task of the church to discern those addictions that have demonic and spiritual influences and deal with them through faith healing, exorcism and deliverance prayers.
- Proper Sexuality Education: Sexuality education has to do with teaching one how to appreciate and live out, his or her sexuality fully. But unfortunately, what is being taught is sex education which is basically education on sex, application of sex styles and how to avoid pregnancy after sex. The church must embrace this task squarely.
- Establishment of more Sexual Addiction Rehabilitation Centers: churches need to invest heavily in this area. Most of the rehabilitation centers are mostly owned by secular institutions which employ mundane and unchristian principles. There is need for churches to own and run rehabilitation centers for sexual addictions.
- Mobilization to end Sexual Abuse in Churches: Sexual abuse is one of the entry points of sexual addiction. And regrettably, churches and church-owned institutions like schools have fallen victim of sexual abuse, especially of minors. “As of 31 May 2017, the Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse had heard from 6,875 survivors of whom 4,029 (58.6%) reported child abuse in religious institutions.” Victims of abuse in churches must be encouraged to speak up and seek help.
- Training for Parents: Many Christian parents are ignorant of this menace. And to curb the menace of sexual addiction, the church must lead the fore in arming parents with the right tools and knowledge to tackle this issue at home. If parents get the right training and knowledge, they can help their children break free from sexual addiction.
- Periodic therapy sessions: in addition to the weeks of spiritual activities like crusade, conferences, etc, churches can as well run free sexual addiction therapy sessions.
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