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Faith’s Cost: A Tale of Belief and Consequences

Margaret walked towards the shade across the entrance of the street. She didn’t stop till she got there. She looked so exalted, droplet of sweat formed on her forehead. She brought out a handkerchief, spread it on the tree branch and sat quietly. She  switched on the sound system that she carried along with her, brought out a bible from her bag, “have you thought of where you will be when you die?” her voice echoed round the street. Some looked at her while most people ignored her.

The street was busy, school children going to school, people coming back from the borehole carrying gallons of water, she sighted two girls coming from the tap, they wore short and singlet, one pushed the barrow,  she struggled to keep the gallons balanced in the barrow, while the second walked behind her. Margret let out a scream of shock that resounded across the street, everyone turned to her direction, “See them! Daughters of Jezebel! Hell fire is real; you that wear bum short and singlet, moving around the street you have a place in hell if you don’t repent.” Eyes were on the two girls and they felt embarrassed.

After a long time of screaming and condemning everyone she saw on the street. She packed her bag and walked home. At home her two kids sat hungrily in front of the veranda waiting for her to come back. They were in their sleep wears their eyes puffy and dried spits on the corners of their mouth. She walked into the compound like she just came back from a fight; her neighbor was already dressed up with her kids. She looked from her to her kids, last week she had condemned her for wearing a short gown, but that day her gown was longer, “she has finally repented,” she muttered to herself. She faked a smile when she said hi to her.

Margret barely stood at a point to talk to anyone; she always walked like she was in a hurry. You would think she is late to an important appointment. A month ago, she had quarreled with her opposite neighbor, Cynthia.  She refused to help her pack her cloth when it was raining.  Their clothes were on the same rope but she picked hers and left her neighbor’s own, in her defense she doesn’t touch anything that belonged to sinner. “Why do you always feel you are more righteous than anyone else, when you harbor so much hate in your heart?” Cynthia blurted. “I rebuke you, you daughter of doom, bad woman, you will rot in hell fire if you don’t repent.” Margret shouted back at her.

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“If this is how a good Christian should behave, then I will rather live in sin.” Cynthia fired back. Everyone ignored them till they were done. It has become a usual thing in the compound, she avoided everyone she feels is not a born again Christian according to her judgment and quarrel them if they crossed her part.

She was the only one in the compound without a job. She only went out for morning cries and goes to church for cleanup.

“Are these children not going to school today?” Agnes asked her. She was the only neighbor she was in good terms with. “No, they haven’t paid their school fees” she replied back. “Eyaa, what are you going to do about it?” she looked at her with pity all over her face. “God will provide.” She said with confidence. “Why not follow me to the market today, my neighbor needs a helper in her shop, she will pay you five thousand naira daily, if you go there for two weeks, you will be able to pay back”

“I am a child of God, I don’t have to suffer to pay bills, I am positive that God will meet my needs, he will send me helper”

“That’s not how God works; he will only help you when you make effort.” She had the urge to tell her she was deceiving herself but she changed her mind to avoid argument.

“I have been preaching his gospel; he will reward me for it.” The answer surprised her neighbor, she knew she was irrational but not to this point.

“You are really a difficult person; I will leave you to your faith, good luck with that.” She was already tired and didn’t have any more things to say to her. She dropped her sound system, changed her shoes to slippers and carried her bag to go out.

“Mummy, are you going out again?” her oldest child who was about eight years asked. He was the brightest child in the compound; she always led the quiz organized by the young corp. member that stayed in the compound.

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“I want to go and work in the church.” She moved in and out of the room gathering broom, bucked and mop. She was still on the dress she wore to her morning preaching.

“I am hungry.” the youngest child cried out. Margret brought out 500 naira from her bag. She was very bad at showing emotions to her children, she treated them like adults. Maybe because of the trauma her husband put her in. she always said they reminded her of the biggest mistake she made in her life and never bothered on how they felt. She married their father because of how close he was to their Pastor, he changed few years into the marriage, he complained so much on how she stays at church more than she stays at home but she insisted he was a weapon fashioned against her heavenly raise. Even after reporting her to her family, she refused and moved out from the house with her children.

She picked everything she has packed, held her first child’s ear and said, “Buy okpa from mama Edu, I will cook when I come back, if you like throw the money away, you will starve.” She sounded so mean.

The church was filled with other women; they started cleaning from inside the church building.

“Well-done, women of faith, the Pastors wife greeted them as she walked inside the church. She was dressed in a black skirt and blue shirt. A young boy of fifteen years carried a cooler of rice behind her. He dropped it on the floor. She wore a light makeup and heavy perfume.

“This is for you all, thanks for always taking out time to work in the church of God, I am going to shop already, see you during the mid week service.”

They were grinning from ear to ear, “Thank you mummy.” They chorused. The women looked like they have lost themselves, most of them looked pale and older than their real aged, they tied head ties that covered their ears, long skirts that hid their legs and shirts that covered their ankle.

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One morning she had just come back from her morning preaching and was preparing to go for cleaning, Agnes just finished washing and was getting ready to leave for shop. Margret stared at her for a while and looked away, “what happened?” “Please, I need one thousand to buy food for my children.” That was the calmest Margret has ever spoken. “Just follow me to market; you will get more than one thousand.” Agnes spoke softly but Margret snapped. “Child of God cannot be mocked, is it because I begged you for money, I am really believing that if I keep working free in church, preach the gospel one day God will reward me” she bragged to her.

“Why do you clean for free, when you can clean people’s house and get paid?” Agnes was already irritated, “it is so annoying that you are fit but has nothing doing except condemning people on the street and doing free work for your pastor. Your pastor’s wife has never abandoned her shop to clean, but you abandoned yourself to clean.” She continued even when she noticed she was getting angry with her words.

Everyone thought she would change but she never changed, she spent every day in church waiting for miracle, she missed every life changing opportunity she got, she believed, she isn’t meant to work for money, but to be located by a destiny helper that will provide money for everything she needed. The day Agnes recommended her to a company that needed a store keeper, she rejected the job because the company produced attachment and wig which she believed is a worldly company and they would only tamper with her faith.

Months passed by, years passed by and she still went to altar to pray for destiny helper in her life. Her husband found his children on the street one day and took them away from her.

 

 

 

 

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